Big Brother 11: Torchwood
by Hayley-Saxon-xx
Summary: The torchwood team are housemates on Big Brother. they've never met; they're just normal people, no Immortality or aliens! : Ianto/Lisa Tosh/Owen Gwen/Rhys Ianto/Jack. please read and review. PREVIOUS USERNAME JANTO-ADDICT. THIS IS STILL ME, I SWEAR! XD
1. Entering the BB house part 1

**A/N: I've had this idea for a while but I never posted it because I was busy with other fics XD All the chapters are in script form (This first one is just VT's and entrances) BB means Big Brother :) no breaks in my BB. I hate commercial breaks.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood (Unfortunately) Nor do I own Big Brother. **

(Davina's stood outside the BB house, crowds behind her)

**DAVINA**: We're back! Big Brother's back!!!

*Credits roll*

**DAVINA**: Yes, BB 11 is here! I know you're on the edge of your seats waiting to see the housemates, so I'll keep you waiting no more.

----Cut to----

(A man wearing an RAF uniform in the interview room for BB)

**JACK**: Hi, I'm capt'n Jack Harkness, I'm 40 and I work for the army.

**BB**: If you could describe yourself in one word what would it be?

**JACK**: Urm, Flirtatious. I enjoy nothing more than a good flirt (laughs) I'm omnisexual, which means that as long as it's got a pulse and a phone number, I'll flirt with it! I AM single, so all you ladies, men, dogs, cats, aliens, whatever; today is your lucky day!

**BB**: what is your best feature?

**JACK**: My charm. I can make anyone fall in love with me, no matter what their sexuality may be. Whatever the situation I can always find something to flirt about!

**BB**: What do you think you'd bring to the house?

**JACK**: Banter and flirting. Whenever you turn on the TV to channel 4 you'll see me and some guy or girl flirting and them blushing and giggling. I'm always up for a good laugh and a good prank but I'll let you know… I always get revenge! (Laughs) Also depending on who's in the house, I can bring romance too! You never know. (He smiles and winks)

*VT ends*

**DAVINA**: Ok, here he is… IT'S JACK!!

(Jack gets out of the car and heads down the walkway, shaking people's hands and kissing girls on the cheeks.)

----Cheers and wolf whistles from crowd----

(He heads up the stairs, still waving to the crowd) He reaches the top and blows kisses to everyone before entering the BB house.)

(Jack walks down the stairs, breathing deeply. When he reaches the bottom, he turns to a mirror and checks his hair then adjusts it slightly.) He then pushes the door open and enters the BB house.)

**JACK** (Shouting): Hello!

(Silence.) There is no one there.)

**JACK:** Oh... (Walks around the BB house.) First one in? Ok, I can live with that. (Turns to a camera) Hello, people, I swear I'm going to give you one hell of a time! I will be THE best Big Brother contestant you've ever had! (He smiles)

------Cut to------

(Davina stood on the platform outside the BB house)

**DAVINA: **Well, let's see if Jack is the best housemate we've had. Let's keep um coming!!

------Cut to------

(A woman in the VT room with shortish curly black hair. Looks slightly Italian. She's wearing a blouse, a fitted Jacket and a skirt)

**SUZIE: **Hello. I'm Suzie Costello, I'm 36 and I'm unemployed.

**BB**: If you could describe yourself in one word what would it be?

**SUZIE**: Er, brave. Whatever you throw at me I'll do it. Nothing scares me and I'll protect myself and others from danger coz it doesn't faze me at all.

**BB**: what is your best feature?

**SUZIE**: My Bravery. Like I said, nothing fazes me, nothing scares me.

**BB**: What do you think you'd bring to the house?

**SUZIE**: I think I'd liven the house up. I mean, when we're having parties I'll make it exciting and fun! Just watch and wait. I'm single at the minute, but not looking for love because I want to focus on getting a job first. Sorry (she grins)

*VT ends*

**DAVINA: **It's SUZIE!!!!

(Suzie gets out of the car)

------Boo's and Jeers from crowd------

(Suzie waves at the crowd as they continue to boo her) She enters the house)

(She walks down the stairs and stumbles in her 4 ½ inch stilettos) She pushes the door open and Jack walks over to her)

**JACK**: Hi.

**SUZIE: **Hello.

**JACK **(shaking her hand): Capt'n Jack Harkness.

**SUZIE: **Suzie Costello.

**JACK: **Glad you came… I was waiting for company.

**SUZIE: **Are we the only ones here?

**JACK: **Yup.

**SUZIE: **Right.

**JACK: **So what was your reaction from the crowd.

**SUZIE **(Lies): Cheers. You?

**JACK: **Cheers and whistles

**SUZIE: **Whistles?

**JACK: **Yup.

**SUZIE: **Oh, I got a few of those too. Mainly cheers though.

------Cut to------

(Davina stood on the platform)

------Crowd boos------

**DAVINA: **She's a LIAR! *Tut-Tut* Anyway… Let's send in another one!!

------Cut to------

(Japanese girl with short straight black hair in the VT room. She's wearing a pair of purple glasses, a pink top, a black fitted Jacket, and pants and heels.)

**TOSHIKO: **Hi. I'm Toshiko Sato but you can call me Tosh, I'm 33 and I'm an IT consultant.

**BB**: If you could describe yourself in one word what would it be?

**TOSHIKO**: Clever. Back at school I was the cleverest person in my year AND the year above me. I won awards for maths, English, science… everything except gym (laughs) I can crack any code, solve any puzzle. My Dad said I was like a superhero! Brainbox to the rescue! (Laughs again)

**BB**: what is your best feature?

**TOSHIKO**: My smartness. I have an IQ of 142 and my boss says I should go and work for the government, cracking codes and infiltrating bases or something. But I'm perfectly happy doing what I do now.

**BB**: What do you think you'd bring to the house?

**TOSHIKO**: Urm… I think I'd bring knowledge. Whenever you tune into big brother, you'd learn something new and I'd be fun too. So I'm like that crazy fun teacher you used to love at school and you used to listen intently coz of how funny they were. (Laughs)

*VT ends*

**DAVINA: **Ok, everyone, she's here, she's smart, and she's crazy… it's TOSHIKO!!!

(Tosh gets out of the car and heads down the walkway)

------A mixture of Cheers and Boos from crowd------

(Tosh shakes a few hands and then heads up the stairs, waves to everyone and heads into the BB house.)

(She walks down the stairs, looking at the décor.)

**TOSHIKO: **Nice colour of the walls. Like the pattern. (She points to the Diary Room door) I take it that's the diary room? (She walks up to the entrance door) Ok… Here goes.

(She pushes it open and Jack and Suzie run over to her) Jack hugs her and kisses her on the cheek.)

**JACK: **Capt'n Jack Harkness

**TOSHIKO: **Toshiko Sato.

**JACK: **Can I call you Tosh? Coz I think it's cute.

**TOSHIKO**: Sure. That can be my new nickname!

**SUZIE **(Shaking Tosh's hand): Suzie Costello.

**TOSHIKO: **Toshiko Sato. (She looks at them both) Phew… That crowd huh? I was confused. Some were cheering me, some were booing. Do they like me or not?

**JACK: **Dunno, I got cheers and whistles.

**TOSHIKO** (Turns to Suzie): What about you?

**SUZIE: **Cheers.

**TOSHIKO: **wow. So I'm the most disliked out of all of us? Great.

------Cut to------

(Davina stood on the platform)

**DAVINA: **Poor Toshiko, thinking that she's the most disliked. That Suzie's going to stir everything up. And _Tosh _such a cute nickname! Isn't Jack such a sweetheart?

************

**The rest of the entrances will be over 2 or 3 chapters :) I know this is so random! Should I carry on, coz it was just a dream I had a while back. Please review!! xxx **


	2. Entering the BB house part 2

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who reviewed you make me smile! And just for the record… I do NOT think Owen is sexy. Ianto is… But not Owrn**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood. I wish I did so I could write a load of Janto fluff and get Gareth and John to act it out :)**

(Davina is stood on the platform outside the BB house)

**DAVINA: **We'll send another one in, shall we?

------Cut to------

(A pale man in jeans and a T-Shirt in the VT room)

**OWEN: **Hey, I'm Owen Harper. Dr. Owen Harper. I'm 27 and I'm a Doctor.

**BB**: If you could describe yourself in one word what would it be?

**OWEN**: Urm, Sexy. Definitely Sexy. Any girl just falls for m

**BB**: what is your best feature?

**OWEN**: My err… Urm, (Clears throat) well, you know. (looks down)

**BB**: What do you think you'd bring to the house?

**OWEN**: I would bring sarcasm and humor. No matter what the situation I can make some sarcastic joke about it. I would also be the hunk of the house coz I'm so handsome! I think my worst housemate would be someone smart and clean and serious. Someone I can't have a laugh with. I'm single but not looking for love because I was engaged not long ago and, uh, she died… 9 months ago, of a brain tumor… (He looks down sadly) Anyway, I'll bet I'll be a hoot in this house!!

*VT ends*

**DAVINA: **It's OWEN!!!

(Owen gets out of the car and walks down the walkway. He shakes only women's hands)

------Boos from the crowd, a few cheers------

(He heads up the stairs waves **to** everyone then enters the BB house)

(He walks down the steps then when he reaches the bottom he pulls out a small bottle of aftershave and sprays himself with it) then goes up to the door and inhales deeply)

**OWEN: **Ok, come on then. (He pushes the door open and is greeted by the others)

**JACK **(Shaking Owen's hand): Capt'n Jack Harkness.

**TOSHIKO: **Toshiko Sato.

**SUZIE: **Suzie Costello.

**OWEN: **Hey, everyone. Owen Harper. (He kisses Tosh and Suzie on the cheek) That crowd really spooked me out. And I thought I was confident.

**JACK: **Yeah. I loved every moment of it. They were cheering and everything.

**TOSH: **I didn't really know what to do in front of all those cameras.

**SUZIE: **I loved it too.

------Cut to------

(Davina stood on the platform)

**DAVINA: **I don't know why Suzie liked it! She was booed! Isn't Jack confident? Anyway, let's send another one in.

------Cut to----

(A man in a pinstripe suit and a waistcoat in the VT room)

**IANTO: **Hello. My name is Ianto Jones. I'm 25 and I work in an office, serving coffee.

**BB**: If you could describe yourself in one word what would it be?

**IANTO**: I'm smart. By that I mean well dressed not clever.

**BB**: what is your best feature?

**IANTO**: I make an amazing cup of coffee. I wish I could make one for you and then you could see how amazing it is.

**BB**: What do you think you'd bring to the house?

**IANTO**: I would bring cleanliness. Because I'm practically OCD with my cleaning and I'd also blow people away with my coffee and I'd cook all the meals. Just you wait till you see how much the people in the house will love me.

*VT ends*

**DAVINA: **One more thing. After we told him he had been picked as a housemate, he said he wouldn't go into the house unless we put a coffee machine in the kitchen. So we did! Here he is, the coffee loving IANTO!!!

(Ianto steps out of the car and heads down the walkway)

------Cheering and whistling from crowd------

(A few girls try to grab him as he walks past but the security stops them. Ianto blushes at all the attention) He climbs up the steps and walks into the BB house.) He runs down the stairs and stops in front of the door, brushes his suit down and straightens his tie before entering) Jack is the first to go up to him as the others are in the kitchen pouring drinks)

**JACK **(shaking his hand): Capt'n Jack Harkness.

**IANTO: **Jones. Ianto Jones.

**JACK: **Nice to meet you, Jones, Ianto Jones.

**IANTO: **Yeah, Same. Nice aftershave.

**JACK: **Not wearing any.

**IANTO **(Shocked): You smell like that naturally?!

(There is an awkward silence between them. But it is broken by the entrance of the other housemates from the kitchen with a tray of full champagne glasses) Ianto takes one then so does Jack. Owen puts the tray down and Shakes Ianto's hand)

**OWEN: **Owen Harper.

**IANTO: **Ianto Jones.

**TOSHIKO **(as Ianto kisses her cheek): Toshiko Sato.

**IANTO: **Ianto Jones.

**SUZIE **(As Ianto kisses her cheek): Suzie Costello

**IANTO: **Ianto Jones.

(Tosh, Owen and Suzie start to chat. Ianto glances over at Jack and catches his eye; they share a moment of eye contact then they join in the conversation)

------Cut to------

(Davina on the platform)

**DAVINA: **Oooh. Did anyone else see that eye contact?! I think we're going to have a romance!! Let's send in another one.

------Cut to------

(A dark skinned woman in a fitted red top and jeans in the VT room)

**LISA: **hey, I'm Lisa Hallett, I'm 26 and I'm a receptionist.

**BB**: If you could describe yourself in one word what would it be?

**LISA**: Urm, funny. I love a good laugh. And a good prank too.

**BB**: what is your best feature?

**LISA**: My morals. I stand for what I believe in. and I won't go down without a fight.

**BB**: What do you think you'd bring to the house?

**LISA**: I would bring fun and laugher! Everyone would want to be my friend and everyone will love me!! Just you wait.

*VT ends*

**DAVINA: **here she is… LISA!!!!!

(Lisa gets out of the car and heads down the walkway)

------Boos and Jeers from the crowd------

(Lisa rolls her eyes and heads up the stairs and into the BB house. She walks down the steps and unbuttons the top two buttons of her blouse and enters the house.) The others come up to her and Owen looks her up and down) they all introduce themselves and Lisa kisses Owen, Jack and Ianto on the cheek. Ianto blushes when she does so despite himself.) They all begin to chat about the crowds and if they cheered or booed)

*******

**Soz I couldn't resist putting some Janto in. XD**

**Review Please!!! **

**xxxx**


	3. Entering the BB house part 3

**A/N: I think this'll be the last entrance chapter. I put think just in case. Coz I've done that before. : ) Again, Just for the record, If I state that anyone (Aside from Jack and Ianto) Is sexy or good looking, that's their own opinion… NOT mine. There's a lot of swearing in this one because Jack is majorly pissed off. And you'll see why soon. Lol. **

**Disclaimer: Nope, still don't own it; I'm working on it alongside world domination. Hehe. **

(Davina is stood on a platform outside the BB house.)

**DAVINA**: Shall we bring another one in?

------Cut to------

(A man in green-grey coloured shirt with a red jacket over it in the VT room)

**JOHN: **Hello ladies and gentlemen, Boys and girls, my name is Captain John Hart. I'm 39 and barman. The captain is just because I knew someone who was a captain and it suited him so I tried adding it to my name and it just fit! I thought, hey that sounds good.

**BB**: If you could describe yourself in one word what would it be?

**JOHN**: Urm, irresistible. Girls and guys can't keep their hands off me. Just ask my ex!

**BB**: what is your best feature?

**JOHN**: My ego. I'm really big headed sometimes and I'll admit it. But it really bodes well when I'm chatting up men and women. I just tell them about myself and I tell them how good I am and it works! By that I guess I don't need to tell you that I'm bisexual. Well, actually I'm omnisexual. Same thing.

**BB**: What do you think you'd bring to the house?

**JOHN: **Anything you can think of. (Laughs) I'm funny. I'm witty. I'm sexy. (Winks) I'm flirtatious. I'm determined. I'm strict. I'm playful. I'm everything! So I'll bring everything to the house, absolutely everything. I'll do well in tasks, I'll flirt. Also, I hate to disappoint everyone, but well, I am single, but not looking for anything serious, one night stands fine, but no relationships because I'm still in love with my ex.

**BB: **Why don't you tell Big Brother about rehab?

**JOHN: **You know I went to Rehab?! Oh well. And it not rehab. Its rehab's. plural. Drink, twice and drugs, three times. So I've been to two different rehabs… and I've been to rehab five times in total. God that's bad, isn't it? Anyway, I'm clean now. Living like a priest. (Laughs)

*VT ends*

**DAVINA: **I forgot to tell you the twist didn't I? Well, John is Jack's ex! And I'm pretty certain that Jack's the one John said he was still in love with! That's going to shake things up, right? It's John!!!

(John gets out of the car and heads down the walkway.)

------mixture of cheers and boos. Mainly Boos------

(He climbs up the stairs and waited for the doors to open, when they did, he headed down the stairs and stopped in front of the mirror, blew it a kiss and entered the BB house.) Everyone turned to look at him as he entered.)

**JACK **(under his breath): Fuck. (Shouting) John?!!

**JOHN: **Jack!!!

(John and Jack run over to each other and stand face to face for a moment before their lips crashed together) Ianto looked both of the men up and down as they kissed. Lisa looked at Ianto and giggled.)

**LISA **(whispering in Ianto's ear): Do you think they know each other or is this how he greets people?

(Ianto laughs) Jack breaks the kiss and looks at John)

**JACK **(Whispering breathlessly): you bastard.

**JOHN: **I know.

(Jack turns to the rest of the housemates) and indicates them in turn.)

**JACK: **Suzie, Tosh, Owen, Ianto, Lisa (He indicates John) this is…

**JOHN: **Captain John Hart.

(Jack scowls at John and storms into the garden and sits at the bus stop)

(Everyone looks at each other.) John walks over to all the girls and kisses each of them on the cheek then shakes Owens hand and, before shaking Ianto's hand looks him up and down and raises his eyebrows) Ianto glares at him and shakes his hand.) Ianto walks into the garden as sits beside Jack at the bus stop)

~~At the bus stop~~

**IANTO: **What's up with you?

**JACK: **Those bastards at Channel 4 had to go and put him in the house as well, didn't they?!

**IANTO: **Who is he?

**JACK: **My ex.

**IANTO: **Then why are you so pissed off? If you used to go out with the guy, you can't hate him that much. What did he do?

**JACK: **Doesn't matter. But we were together for five years! He was so paranoid and annoying. I hated him for about 7 months before we broke up, I just didn't do anything coz we worked together and I didn't want to lose my job because of it.

**IANTO: **There must be another reason why you're so angry.

**JACK: **We used to work in a club while I trained for the army; He started making snide remarks and was being really mean after we broke up. And I punched him really hard. And my boss fired me. I lost my job because he couldn't handle the fact that I split up with him… (sighs) Hang on, Why am I telling you all this? I've only just met you.

**IANTO: **I dunno.

**JACK: **I just feel like I can trust you…

(Jack looks up and stares at Ianto. Ianto stares back for a moment before Lisa enters the garden)

**LISA **(Shouting to them): Are you two coming in? The next housemate will be here in a minute!

(Ianto breaks the eye contact and looks over to Lisa)

**IANTO: **yup, Coming. (Lisa re-enters the house, Ianto turns to Jack and gets up) you coming?

**JACK: **Yeah. (Jack nods and stands up. They both re-enter the house)

------Cut to------

(Davina stood on the platform)

**DAVINA: **I told you it would shake things up. Here's the last housemate.

------Cut to------

(A dark skinned woman in a purple top, red jacket and skinny jeans in the VT room)

**MARTHA: **Hi, I'm Martha Jones, I'm 26 and I'm a trainee Doctor.

**BB**: what is your best feature?

**MARTHA**: My determination. I'm always really determined to save people and I never give up on a patient because we're not getting anywhere with their treatment. No, I always keep going keep trying. I'm also a risk taker. If someone's dying and we either try by playing it safe or there's a really dangerous operation they can have, that could possibly kill them, I'd choose the operation because if it doesn't go wrong, it'll definitely work. So I'd just sit there and hope while my patient goes into theater.

**BB**: What do you think you'd bring to the house?

**MARTHA: **I think I'd be really great in tasks so we'd always end up with the luxury budget. I'd be really determined and I'd always come tops in tasks. No matter what it is, I'll do it.

*VT ends*

**DAVINA: **here she is… It's MARTHA!!!

(Martha gets out of the car and heads down the walkway) She shakes a few hands)

------Boos from the crowd------

(She climbs up the stairs and enters the house.) She runs down the stairs then inhales deeply and enters) the rest of the group walks over to her.)

**JOHN: **Captain John Hart.

**IANTO: **Ianto Jones.

**TOSH: **Toshiko Sato.

**LISA:** Lisa Hallett

**SUZIE: **Suzie Costello.

**OWEN: **Owen Harper. And who are you? (Grins)

**MARTHA: **Martha Jones. And I'm engaged so save your flirting for someone else. (Owen looks slightly embarrassed) Martha Turns to Jack) and who are you?

**JACK **(Deadpan)**: **Capt'n Jack Harkness.

**MARTHA: **Martha Jones.

**JACK: **Whatever. (He storms into the bedroom and flops onto a bed.) Everyone looks slightly uncomfortable with the atmosphere.)

**IANTO: **I'll go talk to him. (He glares at John and follows Jack into the bedroom)

~~In the Bedroom~~

(Ianto sits beside Jack)

**IANTO: **You ok?

**JACK: **No.

**IANTO: **Forget about him.

**JACK: **I can't. You don't get it! Look everything I told you was just the basic stuff. He's done a lot worse than that!

**IANTO: **Then why didn't you tell me before?

**JACK **(Scoffs)**: **Oh, yeah! I don't even know you!

**IANTO: **you can trust me. Please. You have to talk to someone.

**JACK: **I… I just hate him so much! (Wells up)

**IANTO: **Jack…

**JACK: **I would've had an amazing time here if it weren't for him! And those bastards on the production team.

**IANTO: **He probably hates this as much as you.

**JACK: **Are you joking?! He loves this! (a tear slips down his cheek)

**IANTO: **Loves what?

**JACK: **Making me look like a blubbering fool on live TV! (He begins to cry)

**IANTO: **Hey, come on… (Ianto puts an arm around Jack and shifts closer to him) (Jack cries into Ianto who then puts his other arm around him as well, pulling him into an embrace)

**JACK: **Thank you…

*Credits Roll*

**Episode 1… Complete: D The next one will continue from this point XD And beware for evil Ianto! =D **

** *Yells* REVIEW!!!! NOW!!!! Ur, I mean please review *Puppy-dog eyes* **


	4. Day one part 1

**A/N: As I warned last time, beware of evil Ianto. He's evil to someone that you're not going to be happy with though. And unfortunately this chapter is Lisa/Ianto :'( I'm so sorry, please don't hurt me….**

*10 minutes later*

(Jack is no longer crying, instead, he and Ianto are lay on the bed, chatting)

**JACK: **So where do you come from?

**IANTO: **Newport. Moved to London a few years ago, and then moved to Cardiff about six months ago. How about you?

**JACK: **America… Obviously. Moved to Cardiff 22 years ago, the second I got old enough to leave home.

**IANTO: **how come?

**JACK: **Dunno, I just wanted to explore the world decided to go to all the capitals in the UK first, traveled London for a week then went to Cardiff and I never left. Liked it too much.

**IANTO: **Right, how old are you anyway?

**JACK: **40. You?

**IANTO: **25.

**JACK: **Young.

**IANTO: **Don't feel like it. What do you do for a living?

**JACK: **Work for the army. That's why I dress like this. You?

**IANTO: **Oh, well, compared to yours, its a little embarrassing.

**JACK: **go on.

**IANTO: **I serve coffee in an office. Lot f my colleagues say I'm the 'teaboy'

**JACK: **Ah. That's not embarrassing. Well, not that embarrassing anyway. I know people that are in worse jobs than that.

**IANTO: **Still, compared to working in the army though.

**JACK: **yeah. Make a good cup of coffee?

**IANTO: **My friends do say it's amazing.

**JACK: **really?

**IANTO: **yup.

**JACK: **wow.

**IANTO **(standing up): We should go and get to know our fellow housemates better.

**JACK: **ok.

**IANTO: **you coming?

**JACK: **nah. Not right now. I need to do some thinking. I'll be out in a bit.

**IANTO: **right.

(Ianto walks out of the bedroom, Jack watches him leave and only once he's left, Jack exhales deeply.)

~~In the lounge~~

(Everyone is in the garden except Lisa, who is sat on one of the sofas, Ianto enters from the bedroom and sits beside Lisa)

**LISA: **Heya.

**IANTO: **hey.

**LISA: **you ok?

**IANTO: **yeah. Just really bored because of him.

**LISA **(laughs): How is he?

**IANTO: **upset apparently.

**LISA: **why?

**IANTO: **coz his ex boyfriend is in the house.

**LISA: **so? Jeez, what a wuss.

**IANTO: **I know! I felt like saying get a grip man!

**LISA: **why didn't you?

**IANTO: **He was too busy crying, I didn't get a word in edgeways.

**LISA: **he was crying?!

**IANTO: **Yup.

**LISA **(stifling a laugh): Oh my god!

**IANTO: **I know.

**LISA: **What's he done to him anyway?

**IANTO: **the only thing I know is that he lost him his job at a bar. 'part from that, I don't know.

**LISA: **What a prick.

**IANTO: **I know. (Laughs) he should get a grip of himself.

**LISA: **I know, god.

(Jack enters) Lisa snorts with laughter) and then raises her hand to her mouth in order to stifle her laughter) Jack sits by them)

**JACK **(Deadpan): Hey, guys.

**LISA: **Heya.

**IANTO: **hi. You ok?

**JACK: **no, not really.

(Lisa laughs at this point and Jack looks at her in confusion) Ianto bites his lip in order to prevent himself from doing the same as Lisa)

**JACK: **W-what's going on?

**LISA **(giggling uncontrollably): I… we…

(She collapses in laughter, unable to form words)

**IANTO **(suppressing laughter): Urm, we were just… just… (He catches Lisa's gaze and begins to laugh)

**JACK: **Did you tell her?

**IANTO: **well…

**JACK **(Stands up. Angry.): You had no right!

**IANTO **(also angry): You're the one that told me! You don't even know me for Christ's sake!

**JACK: **I thought I could trust you!

**IANTO: **Then you thought wrong!

**JACK **(hurt): Telling her is one thing… (disgusted) But to laugh about it behind my back? (He shakes his head and enters the bathroom)

(Lisa and Ianto are silent for a moment but catch each other's gaze and burst out laughing) Ianto sits beside Lisa and the giggling subsides and they end up staring into each other's eyes) They both slowly lean in, so close to kissing until Ianto looks down into his lap.) Lisa put a finger under his chin and lifts his head up so he is looking at her.) She leans in and softly presses her lips against his) they stay like that for a moment until Ianto places a hand on her cheek and deepens the kiss)

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**Don't worry, It's only a Lovers Tiff! Lol :P **

**Review – I get happy – I open up Microsoft word – type the next chapter – I update quicker =D there simple x **


	5. Day one part 2

**A/N: To everyone who reviewed the last chapter, I'd like to thank you. I know a couple of you were annoyed with Ianto's behavior in the last chapter. I love Ianto to pieces and I know I made him look bad. :P In his defense, he was really drunk, and he made a stupid mistake. Although this chapter is Ianto/Lisa, there is slight Jack/Ianto =) Nominations next chapter!!! Forgot to warn you about those. Lol. Woo off school tomorrow and finished early today!!! Yay! Updates won't be till late tomorrow. Shopping is more important! :P Only kidding, FFN rules but so does shopping!!! **

**Disclaimer: Soon… I will… soon**

(Ianto pulled Lisa close as they continued to kiss passionately) They finally broke away for air. Lisa stared at him for a while before speaking)

**LISA: **Going to make a drink.

(She gets up and walks into the Kitchen) Ianto exhales deeply then looks to the bathroom, guilt plain on his face.) He gets up and straightens his suit and walks over to the bathroom)

~~In the Bathroom~~

(Jack is in the cubicle, he is sat on the the lid of the toilet in, head in his hands, crying.) He hears the door to the bathroom slam. He looks up and wipes his eyes.)

**IANTO **(from inside the bathroom): Jack…?

**JACK: **Go away!

**IANTO: **I just wanted to say sorry…

**JACK: **did you not hear me the first time?! GO. AWAY.

**IANTO: **I can't. Please, Jack, just listen to me?

**JACK: **I'm going to be polite, so I'll ask you one more time… Will you please go away!

**IANTO: **Jack, I…

**JACK: **I asked you three times! PISS OFF!!!!

**IANTO: **Come on, Jack, hear me out.

(Jack swings the door open and steps out, Ianto takes a step back) Jack's eyes are bloodshot and his face is stained with tears and his eyes shimmering with new tears)

**JACK: **What do you want?!

**IANTO: **I want to talk to you.

**JACK: **What's to talk about?!

**IANTO: **This. I didn't mean to upset you, Jack.

**JACK: **Why did you do it then?

**IANTO: **I… (He looks confused) I don't even know.

**JACK: **What?

**IANTO: **Look, Jack, me and you get on so well, more than I do with anyone else in the house! I don't want to lose you as a friend because I made a stupid mistake and then got the giggles.

**JACK **(inhales deeply; considering what Ianto had said): Ok.

**IANTO: **Forgive me? Please.

**JACK: **Yeah, ok.

(Ianto edged towards Jack and wrapped his arms around him.) They held each other for a while until BB rung through the house)

**BB: **This is Big Brother. Will one housemate please come to the diary room?

~~In the diary room~~

(John walks in and picks up the envelope on the chair, then slumps onto the seat)

**BB: **Hello, John.

**JOHN: **Alright, bro?

**BB: **John, in your hand is an envelope. Please take it back to the house and read it aloud to your fellow housemates.

**JOHN: **Okie Dokie. (He exits the diary room)

---------

(John gathers the group around the dining table; he opens the envelope and reads the content aloud.)

**JOHN **(Reading): Housemates, welcome to the big brother house. In this envelope are the rules and regulations that you must follow during your time in the house. If you fail to follow the rules you will be punished. Also in the envelope is the plan for the bedroom. (Groans and mutters of annoyance from housemates) Big Brother has chosen where each housemate will sleep and housemates are not permitted to swap beds or sleep in another bed at all. This has now become a fundamental rule therefore it should be followed by all housemates. (He puts the envelope down) Can you believe them?

**TOSH: **Where are we all sleeping then, John?

**JOHN **(picking up the envelope and looking at the bedroom plan): Tosh… You are sharing with Owen, Jack you're sharing with Ianto, Lisa is in the bed by Ianto's side of the bed and I'm on the bed next to Jack's side. Suzie you are in the bed next to Owen and Tosh's and Martha you are in the bed next to her.

**IANTO **(under his breath but loud enough for the others to hear): Great. That's just great.

**JACK: **Anyone know the time?

**OWEN **(Trying to turn his watch on his wrist round so he can see it): It's… Urm…

**IANTO **(instantly looking at his watch, showing that he is more organized than Owen): 11:45

**JACK: **god, that late?!

**IANTO: **Yup. (He shows Jack his watch) See?

**SUZIE: **Jeez, no wonder I'm tired. (Yawns) I'm going to bed.

**LISA: **Yeah, same. (Stands up) Night guys.

(Lisa walks over to Ianto and places a soft kiss on his lips then pulls back, blushing, as she realizes what she just did) the jealousy is clear on Jack's face as Lisa leaves the room, still blushing)

**MARTHA: **What was all that about? Little bit of kissing?

**IANTO: **Oh, It was, Urm, err… we just… I… (He blushes terribly)

**TOSH: **You didn't pull back. I take it that it wasn't the first time?

**IANTO: **Well, no.

(Jack's breathing got heavier as his jealousy increased. Owen spotted this and looked at him in a considerate way) Jack nodded and shot him a look that told Owen he should keep quiet. Owen nodded) unknown to Jack and Owen, Tosh had seen the whole thing.)

**MARTHA: **So when? How?

**IANTO: **about 20 minutes before John came out of the diary room. Me and Jack had had a (He paused, trying to think of a word that wouldn't cause too many questions) Disagreement and me and Lise were talking and she kissed me. Simple as that.

**MARTHA: **Wow. You're quick aren't you?

**IANTO: **well (Blushes) I, Urm, yeah…

**OWEN: **Going for a fag. Anyone want to come? (He looks over at Jack with an expression telling Jack that HE should come)

**JACK: **Yeah, I will.

(He and Owen stand up and walk into the garden.)

~~The bus stop~~

(Owen and Jack sit at the bus stop. Owen lights a cigarette and begins to smoke it)

**OWEN: **You ok?

**JACK: **Why wouldn't I be?

**OWEN: **Oh come on, don't pretend nothing happened. (Jack looks blank) I saw how jealous you were about Lisa and Ianto.

**JACK: **What? Me jealous. Nah, sorry mate. You must be seeing things.

**OWEN: **Jack…?

**JACK: **Seriously. I wasn't jealous!

**OWEN: **I don't know you, Jack. But I DO know jealously when I see it. So tell me… Lisa or Ianto?

**JACK **(defeated.): Ianto.

**OWEN: **Really?! (Jack glared at him) Sorry. But I mean, you like Ianto?

**JACK: **Yes! Ok, yes I do.

**OWEN: **You going to tell him?

**JACK: **I WAS. But I'm not going to anymore.

**OWEN: **Aww, why?

**JACK: **Coz he's all shacked up with Lisa, isn't he?

**OWEN: **So?! (Jack looks at him, confused) Look, I saw how he looks at you, when he thinks no one is watching. He likes you too. I can tell. If you tell him, who knows what might happen.

**JACK: **You think?

**OWEN: **Mate, I know.

**JACK: **Thanks.

**OWEN: **Look, I don't say this to many people and I want you to swearyou won't tell anyone… EVER.

**JACK: **Ok, sure.

**OWEN: **You are THE nicest person in this house and you're not bad looking either, look if I was gay, I would be head over heels in love with you! Ok, so if Ianto isn't attracted to you, then he's an idiot. A blind idiot! (Claps Jack on the back & puts out his cigarette and goes inside.)

~~In the lounge~~

(Ianto is sat on the couch, John opposite him. Owen walks in and smiles at them.)

**OWEN: **Going bed.

**IANTO & JOHN: **Ok.

**IANTO: **Know what? I might too. (Ianto gets up and walks with Owen into the bedroom)

(Jack enters and sits opposite John)

**JOHN: **Jack?

**JACK **(Snapping): What?!

**JOHN: **I wanna tell you something…

**JACK: **What?!

**JOHN: **I never intended to make you mad at me!

**JACK: **Then why did you do it?!

**JOHN: **Coz I'm in love with you!!!!

(Both men fell silent & remained like this until Jack got up.)

**JACK: **I'm going to bed.

**JOHN: **Jack, wait… I never meant to…

**JACK: **I'll talk to you in the morning! Night.

**JOHN: **Night, Jack…

~~In the bedroom~~

(Ianto is turned in his bed so he is facing Lisa, they are chatting quietly. Martha, Tosh, Owen and Suzie are all asleep.) Jack enters. Smiles at Ianto, gets changed and slips into bed next to him.) Ianto smiles back and continues his conversation with Lisa.) Jack sighs and rolls over, turning away from Ianto, and closed his eyes, trying to sleep.)

**LISA **(Whispering)**: **God, you seen the time?

**IANTO: **No, why?

**LISA: **It's really late. I'm going to sleep.

**IANTO: **ok, sure. (He leans off the bed, she does the same and they kiss before they got back in bed and tried to sleep)

--------Credits Roll--------

**Next chapter is the nominations!!! :O **

**Review!!! x**


	6. Day two part 1

**A/N: NOMINATIONS!!!! AHH!! The people that are up for eviction will be in a poll on my profile and the person with the most votes will be evicted! Vote please or I won't have anyone to evict :( **

**Ok, I thought I'd let u all know that I am very upset that this story has been added to a C2 community for bad Torchwood fics for a WTF plot line apparently!! If any of you agree that this plot line is stupid, I want you to tell me! Ok, coz the creator of the community said that all of you think the same thing but are telling me otherwise coz your all scared of offending me! I wouldn't be offended I just want you to tell it to me straight, ok? It wasn't just that my fic has been added but ALL of the fics (except her new one) of another author who not only writes all of my favorite fics but is a close friend of mine and had deeply hurt both of us and we both feel rather insecure about our writing now :( So if the creator of that community is reading this, I'll let you know… We're all deeply hurt by your words!!! **

**HUGE thanks to Gwencooper08, JonesIantoJones, NO-PANTIES & the Wedding Fairy for their help and support during this. If it wasn't for you four, I probably wouldn't be writing this right now… THANK YOU SO MUCH. Doesn't mean that the others that have reviewed are ignored, it's just that these few people have helped so much, if they had Nobel Prizes on FFN, I would give you four people one. **

-----The next morning-----

*Day two in the Big Brother house, 8;30am*

(The alarm blared through the big brother house) it was the sound of a bomb exploding which startled a lot of the housemates awake. The others slowly woke up due to all the fuss in the room)

**TOSH: **Shit. Balls. Shit. (She cursed as she woke up)

**OWEN: **Urg, do we have to have an alarm?!

**IANTO: **yup. It says so in the rules.

**MARTHA: **Great. I'm going to look forward to that.

(Everyone climbs out of bed and plods into the Lounge and flops on the sofas)

**IANTO: **Alright, Anyone for coffee?

(Everyone nods and thanks him) Ianto walks into the kitchen and begins to make coffee.) He returns with cups of coffee for everyone) He hands them around and they all drink it)

**JACK: **Wow. Great coffee, Ianto.

**IANTO: **Thanks.

**TOSH: **Yeah! God.

**MARTHA: **It's amazing.

**OWEN: **From now on, you're always making us coffee.

**IANTO: **ok, sure.

**JOHN: **Thanks Eye-Candy.

**IANTO: **Eye-Candy?

**JOHN: **Yeah, thought you suited it.

*Day two in the Big Brother House 9:30am*

(Everyone is sat on the sofas all of them are dressed. They are all talking)

**BB: **This is Big Brother, will Ianto please come to the diary room.

**IANTO: **Ooh, I think this is the nominations!

(Ianto heads for the diary room)

~~In the Diary room~~

(Ianto enters and flops onto the chair)

**BB: **Hello, Ianto.

**IANTO: **Heya.

**BB: **Will you give the name of your first nomination and the reason for this nomination.

**IANTO: **Err, my first nomination is… Jack. It really upsets me to nominate him, but he IS the only person I've fallen out with, god, that makes me sound like a kid, I'll re-phrase that, the only person I've argued with. He is moping around a lot as well, just because his ex is in the house. I mean, if MY ex was in the house I don't think it'd bother me as much as that.

**BB: **Will you please give the name of your second nomination and the reason for this nomination.

**IANTO: **My second nomination is for John. He is really cocky and he keeps calling me Eye Candy!! I got really pissed off at him. He keeps taking digs at Jack as well and its really starting to effect Jack's time in the house!

**BB: **Thank you, Ianto.

---Ianto leaves---

~~In the lounge~~

(Ianto joins the other housemates on the sofa and sits beside Lisa)

**JOHN: **was it the nominations, eye-Candy?

**IANTO: **yup.

**TOSH: **Ooh, who did you vote for?

**IANTO: **I'm not allowed to tell, sorry.

**OWEN: **Spoil sport.

**IANTO: **They would probably put ME up for eviction!

**BB: **Would Jack please come to the diary room?

**JACK: **My turn.

~~In the Diary Room~~

(Jack enters and sits on the chair)

**BB: **Hello, Jack.

**JACK: **Hey.

**BB: **Will you give the name of your first nomination and the reason for this nomination.

**JACK: **My first nomination is… Lisa. I just DON'T like her. Everything she says or does is in spite and she's always judging other people. Grr… I seriously don't like her.

**BB: **Will you please give the name of your second nomination and the reason for this nomination.

**JACK: **My second nomination is for John. S'pose you already know the reason. We used to date for god's sake! He lost me my job and he's done far worse as well, things I'm not planning on saying on television. He's making my time in the house a misery. Get him out!!!

**BB: **Thank you, Jack.

(Jack leaves)

~~In the lounge~~

(Jack enters and sits next to Owen on the sofa)

**JOHN: **Guess it's me next.

**BB: **Will John please come to the diary room.

**JOHN: **Told you.

*Day two in the big brother house 10:35am. Today the housemates have been voting for who they want to go up for eviction. John voted for: Suzie and Martha. Lisa voted for Jack and Suzie. Martha voted for: Suzie and Tosh.*

(Everyone is still sat on the sofas. They are all talking.)

**OWEN: **ok, I've got a question. What's the most embarrassing TV program or film you've cried at?

**TOSH: **The lion king.

**LISA: **Titanic.

**MARTHA: **Forest Gump.

**JACK: **I've never actually cried at anything fictional.

**OWEN: **Me neither.

**JOHN: **No, I haven't either.

**IANTO: **Me neither. Oh, wait, I did cry when I read Harry Potter. (The guys look at him like he's crazy) What? It's sad!

**BB: **Will Owen please come to the diary room.

~~In the diary room~~

(Owen enters and slumps onto the chair.)

**BB: **Hello, Owen.

**OWEN: **Alright?

**BB: **Will you give the name of your first nomination and the reason for this nomination.

**OWEN: **My first nomination is…Suzie. She's a compulsive liar, I can tell. Everything she says is a lie, I think. I don't know if I can trust her. She speaks and I never know if she's telling the truth or lying. Every time I speak to her, I feel nervous coz I think she's lying to me!

**BB: **Will you please give the name of your second nomination and the reason for this nomination.

**OWEN: **My second nomination is for Ianto. He's getting _involved _with Lisa to make Jack jealous and he _knows _Jack likes him and he's using it as an advantage to treat Jack like shit, knowing that Jack'll forgive him.

**BB: **Thank you, Owen.

~~In the lounge~~

(Owen returns and sits beside Jack)

**IANTO: **Alright, mate? Who did YOU vote for then?

**OWEN: **I'm not saying!

**IANTO: **so you wanted ME to tell when you won't even tell yourself? God.

**BB: **Will Suzie come to the diary room.

*Day two in the Big Brother house. 10:46am. Suzie voted for: Jack and Tosh.*

(Jack, Owen, Tosh, Suzie and John are in the lounge. Ianto and Lisa are in the bedroom. Martha is in the bathroom.)

~~in the lounge~~

**JACK: **Urm, I dunno what my least favourite city is!

**OWEN: **Answer the question, Jack!

**JACK: **Fine! Urm, London. It's too busy.

**TOSH: **Mines… New York. It's too rough.

**OWEN: **Any city in Germany.

**JOHN: **How racist!

**OWEN**: Yeah but after what they did during the war…

**JOHN: **That was like… 60 years ago!

**OWEN: **Still… Right, what's yours then?!

**JOHN: **LA. The people are too snobby.

**SUZIE: **Mines…Cardiff. It's full of shit.

**JACK: **I live there!!!!

**BB: **Will Tosh please come to the diary room.

~~In the Diary room~~

(Tosh enters and sits on the chair)

**BB: **Hello, Toshiko.

**TOSH: **Hello, Big Brother.

**BB: **Will you give the name of your first nomination and the reason for this nomination.

**TOSH: **Jack. He's been moping around the whole house since John entered and he's bumming everyone out! I'm sick of seeing his miserable face! It's seriously annoying me! I feel really depressed when I'm around him.

**BB: **Will you please give the name of your second nomination and the reason for this nomination.

**TOSH: **My second nomination is for Ianto. He's such an evil pig. And he's been really spiteful to Jack. Every time he kisses Lisa he looks at Jack smugly like: _I made you jealous!!! Ha-ha._

**BB: **Thank you, Toshiko.

*As a result of the nominations, Jack and Suzie are facing eviction. Day two 12:45 in the Big Brother House. Big Brother has gathered all housemates on the sofa*

**BB: **This is Big Brother. In no particular situation, the housemates facing eviction are… Jack (Pause) and… Suzie.

(Jack and Suzie look shocked and sad. Ianto looks at Jack sadly, guilt written all over his face)

*****

**Ooh!! VOTE FOR WHO YOU WANT TO GO!!!! And don't forget to review!! xXx**


	7. eviction

**A/N: Ooh, it's the chapter you've all been waiting for!!!! Thanks to Gwencooper08 for being a fan! Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. I've had writers block. Sorry sorry please don't hate me. **

(Davina is stood outside the BB house, the crowd behind her are screaming: "Get Suzie out! Get Suzie out!")

DAVINA: It's the evection! Who do you want to go? You choose!!!!

*Title credits*

DAVINA: The votes are in and WE know who's going… But we're going to save it until later! Let's see what the housemates are up to.

---------

~~In the Lounge~~

(Tosh is doing Suzie's hair and Martha is doing her make-up for the eviction.)

TOSH: You want your hair curled or straightened?

SUZIE: Well, It's already curly. Leave it like that.

TOSH: I'm going to sort it out though. If I leave it as curly as it is, it'll be really frizzy.

SUZIE: Fine. (Tosh begins to curling Suzie's Hair)

~~In the bedroom~~

(Ianto is doing Jack's tie for him; Lisa is sat on the bed watching them)

LISA: Why you getting Ianto to do your tie?

JACK: Coz he wears suits all the time so he'll know how to do ties the best.

IANTO: no. It's because I'm awesome. (Ianto laughs)

LISA: ok… (She gets up and goes to leave) I'm doing Suzie's nails so I'll have to go. (she leaves)

(Ianto finishes doing Jack's tie but keeps his hand on Jack's chest. Jack looks at the hand and there is an awkward silence. Ianto looks up from his hand and realizes his and Jacks faces are close together, only millimeters from touching.)

IANTO (clearing his throat nervously): Urm, sorry. (He removes his hand and steps back) I'll go make some coffee. (Ianto leaves quickly)

(Jack fingers the tie and exhales)

--------------CUT TO--------------

(Davina and the crowd)

DAVINA: Am I the only one that can see the sexual tension between those two?! Let's talk to the house.

----Cut to----_Live _

(The housemates are gathered on the sofas. Jack is on one sofa, Suzie on the other.) On Jack's sofa are Owen, John, Ianto and Lisa. On Suzie's are Martha and Tosh)

DAVINA (into house from outside): Big Brother House, this is Davina, you are live on Channel 4 please do not swear. (all housemates cheer) Jack (He says hello) Suzie (She waves) the votes have been counted and verified and I can now reveal that the first housemate to be evicted from the big brother house is… (Long pause) SUZIE!!!! (All housemates get up and hug) Suzie, you have 30 seconds to say your goodbyes… I'm coming to get you!

JACK: I thought it was me… I really did.

(all housemates say goodbye and hug and congratulate Jack)

BB: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…. Suzie you have been evicted please leave the big brother house. (The words 'Suzie you have been evicted please leave the big brother house' constantly repeat.

(Suzie leaves and heads up the stairs and stops in front of the doors waiting for them to open) When they do she's hit by a wave of ear piercing boos) She smiled and waved at them all as she headed towards Davina)

DAVINA (Holding her arm and shouting to the crowd): IT'S SUZIE!!!!!!

(Boos) Davina takes Suzie to the interview room and sits her down)

DAVINA: Ok, Suzie. You haven't been in the house long so this interview isn't going to be very long.

SUZIE: Ok.

DAVINA: What was it like in the big brother house? The dynamics and atmosphere?

SUZIE: Well, It got uncomfortable at times coz we didn't know each other and we were trapped in a house together, forced to see each other every day. It was quite fun to make friends and see who people are and things like that though.

DAVINA: talking about dynamics… did you see any relationships bubbling under the surface?

SUZIE: Urm… not really. Lisa and Ianto? But that was public wasn't it? Urm… no.

DAVINA: well, I spotted one and I'm not sure if anyone else did.

SUZIE: Who?

DAVINA: Jack and Ianto? (The crowd cheer in agreement) Well, these guys spotted it.

SUZIE: Jack? And Ianto? You think?

DAVINA: Yeah! You could cut the sexual tension in there with a knife!

SUZIE: I didn't spot a thing! (She laughs)

DAVINA: Anyway, What was it like being the first person to be evicted from the big brother house?

SUZIE: Well, someone's gotta go, ain't they? And I knew once I was up against Jack that I was a goner so it didn't really bother me. Like the saying goes: It's not the winning it's the taking part that counts. And I'm so glad that I actually got this opportunity.

DAVINA: Thank you, Suzie. You've been amazing. Here are your best bits.

--------Suzie's best bits--------

_(Suzie entering the house and meeting everyone. Nominating people. Finding out the results of the nominations. Having her hair curled and make-up done. Then leaving and it freezes there and cuts back to live Interview)_

SUZIE: that it? God, I wasn't in there for long.

DAVINA: I know. Everyone… It's SUZIE!!!

----------------------

(Davina is stood on the platform. Suzie is gone)

DAVINA: Ooh. We have a surprise. Did we forget to tell you?

----Cut to----

(A woman wearing a red top, black jeans, black boots and a leather jacket with dark straight hair and a gap in her teeth)

GWEN: Hello. I'm Gwen Cooper I'm 29 years old and I'm a police Officer

BB: If you could describe yourself in one word what would it be?

GWEN: Urm. Determined. Whenever I'm on a case I never give up, I follow all leads and I continue on the case until it's solved. I'd never give up on a case coz we don't have a lead I'd continue anyway.

BB: what is your best feature?

GWEN: The gap in my teeth. I love it I dunno why. I think it's coz it makes me unique and look different. My fiancé loves it too!

BB: What do you think you'd bring to the house?

GWEN: Banter. Comedy and a real down to earth touch. I'll probably flirt a lot but I love my fiancé and it's just a bit of fun! I'll also stand up for what I believe in, so prepare for some arguing if people say something offensive to anyone.

*VT ends*

DAVINA: It's our dirty secret… GWEN!!!

(Gwen gets out of the car and heads down the walkway)

*cheers from the crowd a few scattered boos*

(She heads up the stairs and into the house then she walks down the steps and pushes the door open) Everyone screams and greets her) She laughs and hugs them all)

GWEN: I'm Gwen cooper. (They all introduce themselves)

----End credits-----

**The votes stood at a massive 16 nil! :o thanks to all those who voted. This is dedicated to you. **

**Review? xxxxxxxxxx**


	8. Day three part 1

**A/N: Sorry for the delay. I'm going to put this on all my fics now: there's going to be a P delay in all updates as I have 11 or so fics going. Hope you enjoy. I want to get to 100 reviews by the next eviction so please Review. I'm thinking about changing the format to story rather than script but it may be more difficult. I'm not sure if we have a different name for a Chief Resident in Britain but I watch Scrubs and that's what it's from. **

**Dedicated to: Gwento-Addict, Captain-Jack95, TheWeddingFairy, TheJokerMelissa and Janto-rulz for being hilarious on msn =) also dedicated to Willowpax-Xzera-Razo for reminding me about this fic, as I completely forgot about it!**

---------Next morning-------

(All housemates are sleeping in bed. Gwen is in Suzie's bed, everyone else is in normal allocated beds) (an alarm, the noise of a crying baby rings through the house, waking all the housemates)

GWEN: is it like this every morning?

MARTHA: pretty much.

GWEN: oh, god. (She climbs out of bed and puts her dressing gown on before padding into the living room and flopping on the sofa. Closely followed by Jack and Owen) I'm going to hate it here.

JACK: I'm sure you'll be fine. So tell me and Owen a bit about you, Y'know jobs, boyfriend, dreams and aspirations the usual.

GWEN: Well, I'm a police officer, I have a fiancé called Rhys (shows them the ring and they nod approvingly) I hope to be the Crime Scene Investigators one day, and no I don't mean the show I mean the rank of police, I hope to have a few children and live a normal life. Does that cover everything?

JACK: Just about.

OWEN: We should get everyone in and ask them all!

GWEN: think people'll go along with it though?

OWEN: Yeah.

GWEN: ok, want me to get everyone in?

JACK: Ok!

----------

(The whole group is sat on the sofa, Gwen has repeated what she said previously to Jack and Owen and Jack asked the question, hoping to get to know everyone better)

JACK: Ok, I'll go first. So I'm Jack, 40 years old, I work for the army, RAF to be more precise, I'm single, omnisexual, I don't really have any work aspirations as I'm already a Captain but I'd like to be married with kids. Who's next?

OWEN: I'll go next. I'm Owen Harper, I'm 27, I'm a doctor, I'm single, just recovered from the death of my fiancé (this arouses some awws from the girls) Straight and I aspire to be chief resident one day, I hope to remarry and have children, like most people.

TOSHIKO: I'm Toshiko, I'm 33, I'm an IT consultant, I'm single, Straight as far as I know. I would love to crack codes for the government as it was what my dad said I should do, Not too keen on kids but would like a husband.

IANTO: I'm Ianto Jones, 25, I work in an office making coffee, Urm do I class myself as single (he glances over at Lisa) anyway, I would love to help tourists or something or work in a coffee shop and I'd like to get married, not sure about children yet.

LISA: I'm Lisa, I'm 26 I'm a receptionist, again not sure about the single thing, I'd love to be a business woman one day and I'd like kids and a normal life.

MARTHA: I'm Martha, I'm 26, I'm a trainee doctor, and I have a husband, Thomas Milligan, He's also a doctor. I'd love to be Chief resident like Owen and I'd like to have children as I'm already married.

JOHN: I'm John Hart, I'm 39 and I'm a barman, I'm single but hope to be with Jack again one day (Winks at Jack, Jack scowls) I'd like to be a landlord preferably of a bar and I want to get married to Jack, no kids, he'd be a terrible dad. (Jack glowers at him)

JACK (muttering under breath): I would not.

OWEN: That's everyone, now I'm going for a fag. Anyone coming?

LISA: I will.

GWEN: Me too.

(Owen, Lisa and Gwen leave. Tosh goes into the bathroom and runs a bath, John goes into kitchen with Martha leaving Jack and Ianto alone)

JACK: Nominations tomorrow.

IANTO: unfortunately.

JACK: Hmm, I'm still thinking about who to vote.

IANTO: Can't talk about it, remember? (Jack nods) Hey, I'm sorry about how mean I've been lately, fresh start?

JACK: ok, (Ianto goes to shake Jack's hand but Jack hugs him instead.)

IANTO: Coffee?

JACK: sure. (Jack nods and Ianto goes into the kitchen)

(Lisa emerges from the garden)

LISA: listen, cry boy, I know you're interested in Ianto but he's kinda with me, and even if he wasn't, I don' t think he'd go for someone like you, you're too whiny.

JACK: Excuse me; I think he's more interested in me than you.

LISA (scoffs): Oh, yeah… that's why he snogs me and not you!

JACK: Ever heard of something called using? He's using you to make me jealous!

LISA: Piss off! (She punches Jack in the face and Owen walks in)

OWEN: What the…?

JACK: Fuck you!

(Lisa hits Jack again and Owen grabs her, holding her back but she turns and punches him too)

LISA: Get off!

(Ianto appears from the kitchen, and tries to stop the fight which has started between Jack, Lisa and Owen)

IANTO: Lisa! What the hell?!

(Owen turns and punches Ianto to stop him from interfering; the others come in due to all the commotion)

JOHN: My, my. A cat fight, this house is more interesting than I thought.

GWEN: Oh, fuck off. Those are your friends tearing chunks out of each other and all you can do is make some sleazy comment?

JOHN: Just coz they're fighting, you don't have to get all riled up.

GWEN: As a police officer it's my job to deal with things like this. (She prepares herself then runs into the fight, trying to break them apart but only results in getting shoves into the wall by Ianto)

MARTHA: Oh, my god! Gwen! (She runs over to help and Lisa grabs her hair and drags her into the fight) Ahh, shit!

(John comes over to help Gwen but Jack punches him due to how angry he is)

JOHN: Jesus, what did I do?!

(At this point Jack, Owen and Martha are trying to leave the fight but Ianto and Lisa keep throwing punches at them)

TOSH: Why are you all fighting?!!!!

JACK: keep out of this, Tosh!

LISA: He thinks you're attracted to him, Ianto! (She points at Jack)

IANTO: He thinks what?! (laughs) In your dreams, mate! (He punches Jack)

JACK: Jesus!

BB: This is big brother, will Ianto and Lisa please come to the diary room.

IANTO: Shit.

(Ianto obliges but Lisa continues to fight. She punches Jack and then kicks him in the balls)

LISA: He doesn't like you!!! (She hits him again)

OWEN: Lise, calm down. (She doesn't so Owen grabs her)

*In the diary room*

BB: Hello, Ianto.

IANTO: Hmm.

BB: As you know it is against Big Brother rules to cause any physical pain to others intentionally.

IANTO: It wasn't just me and Lise; it was Jack and Owen too!

BB: We are aware that Jack and Owen were involved in physical combat but they were defending themselves, nevertheless they will be punished in due course. However, is Big Brother correct by saying that you and Lisa were the ringleaders and inflicting most of the pain?

IANTO: Suppose.

BB: Therefore, you will proceed to jail and stay there until further notice.

IANTO: ok, fine.

*In the living room*

(The fight between Owen and Lisa continues. Jack is sat on the couch, he is battered and bruised)

(Ianto enters and moves towards the garden. Jack stands up and follows him into the garden)

JACK: Ianto! What happened in the diary room?

IANTO: I have to go to jail.

JACK: I'm sorry (He kisses Ianto passionately)

IANTO: What…? (He looks at Jack confused the goes into jail and doesn't speak another word)

BB: This is big brother will Lisa come to the diary room immediately.

*Diary room*

LISA (Coming in): What?!

BB: As you know it is against the rules to inflict pain in the house. When big brother asked you to come to the diary room, you refused and continued to attack Owen. Correct?

LISA: Yeah.

BB: Ignoring big brothers instructions is also against the rules. Therefore, in conclusion you have committed enough violations of the rules for big brother to take drastic action. We have no choice other than remove you from the big brother house. Please leave the house from the door on your left where a crew member will meet you.

LISA: Bastards! (She goes to leave.) Tell Ianto I'm sorry, yeah?

BB: Please leave the diary room using the door on your left.

LISA: Yeah, I know!! (She leaves)

* * *

**What did you think?! =D Lisa's out of the way, which means not long till Janto XD yay!! **

**Review!!! Xx x x x x **


	9. Day three part 2

**A/N: I'm really pleased with the feedback I'm getting for this fic! =D I love you all!!! Sorry for the delay, again =)**

**Dedicated to: Gwento-Addict, Captain-Jack95, TheWeddingFairy and Hh**

*3:47 pm*

(Ianto has been in jail for 3 hours and 23 minutes. Jack is in the bath. Gwen and Toshiko are talking about the fight between Lisa, Ianto, Jack and Owen which took place earlier that day)

*Living room*

GWEN: I mean, I didn't expect Ianto to just fly of the handle like that, I was shocked.

TOSH: I know. And Lisa too, she seemed so…nice.

GWEN: I'll be shocked if Ianto survives nomination. Everyone will vote for him. I know I'm going to.

TOSH: Yeah, I'm not too sure yet. I wanna see how he behaves. But if he's still moody, I'm nominating him.

GWEN: Yeah. (Looks shocked) Oh god! We can't talk about that can we?

TOSH: Oh no!

GWEN: D'you think Big Brother heard us?

TOSH: Of course! They've got camera's everywhere!

GWEN: Shit, We're screwed then.

TOSH: What if they punish the whole house?

GWEN: Nah, they won't, will they?!

*In the bathroom*

(Jack is in the bathroom, drying his hair. He is in nothing but a dressing gown. Owen walks in)

OWEN: Alright, mate?

JACK: Yeah, I'm just a bit worried about Ianto. He's not spoken since Lisa left. Maybe I should go talk to him?

OWEN: Oh, forget about him! For Christ's sake! He's the one who turned his back on you. Now leave him. Don't let him knock you down again.

JACK (sighing): I know, it's just—

OWEN (Interrupting): No! What kinda idiot are you? God. (Pauses) Tell you something, if I was you, I'd vote for him tomorrow. He's gonna vote for us so let's vote for him. He's a bastard. A class-A bastard. He deserves to be voted out. So nominate him, Y'know everyone else will.

JACK: I know he's not exactly been the nicest person. But he deserves our respect. He's just finding his bearings at the minute maybe we shouldn't gang up on him. (Sigh) Anyway, I already know who I'm voting for.

OWEN: Oh, yeah? Who?

JACK: Well, its two women I'll tell you that.

OWEN: Ooh, ganging up on the girls? What happened to you being out to get John?

JACK: I'm cutting him a little slack. I'm putting the past behind me. I'm never going to enjoy this experience if I let him drag me down, eh?

OWEN: Good man.

(He pats him on the shoulder and leaves)

*In the garden*

*4:23pm*

(Ianto has been in jail for the past 4 hours. Big Brother allows prisoners to have a toilet break every hour. Owen and John are having a cigarette at the bus stop)

BB: This is big brother. Ianto's 20 minute toilet break starts now.

(The door to the jail opens and Ianto walks out, not speaking or smiling)

JOHN: Hey, eye candy, are you ok?

(Ianto just glances over at John and carries on walking)

*In the living room*

(Jack is eating a cream cake.)

(Ianto enters)

JACK (looking up): Hey, Ianto? You ok?

(Ianto doesn't speak, he just smiles slightly as in yeah he is ok)

(He walks into the bathroom. Jack follows)

*in the bathroom*

JACK: Talk to me, Ianto! (Sighs) Open up to me. You can't keep all your emotions buried away. Talk to me, please.

IANTO (turning round to look at Jack): About what?! I'm trying to have a piss here! So please go away and leave me alone! I don't wanna talk to anyone. Especially you.

JACK: Fine! But Y'know I'm the only one in this damn place who actually cares right now! Everyone else would rather you dead. Not me. Because I _care_. So if you want an actually existence in this house, you better start treating me better because right now, I'm the only friend you've got.

IANTO: That's what I don't get. Why you? Why do _you _care? Out of everyone, why are you the one who sticks by me?

JACK: Because I believe in you. I believe you're a good man who got lost in love. And who's just finding his feet again.

IANTO: I did love her. (Looks down) I know I only knew her a few days, but I really did. And I'm so angry at myself for it. Everyone hates me and I'm not a bad man, Jack. I'm not.

JACK (softly): I know, Ianto. I know. (Offers him a hug. Ianto hugs him, clinging tightly)

IANTO (beginning to cry): I'm so sorry, Jack. I really am.

JACK: I know, it's ok.

IANTO: Now I've really gotta go to the loo. (he laughs. Jack lets go. He goes into the cubicle and locks it)

*5:17pm*

(Ianto is still in jail. Jack is sat beside his cell, talking to him)

*In the garden*

JACK: urm, Brad Pitt? No, no, Jonny Depp.

IANTO: Jonny Depp is NOT the hottest person on TV, Jack!

JACK: I think he is! Alright then, who do you think?

IANTO: Ooh, Kym Marsh is quite hot. Urm, Beyonce is in an obvious way. Ah, I dunno

BB: This is big brother, will all housemates gather on the sofa immediately.

JACK: Oh?

(Ianto's jail door opens. Ianto and Jack enter the living room)

*living room*

(All the housemates sit down)

BB: Housemates, you have broken a fundamental rule of the house by discussing nominations.

JOHN: We have?

MARTHA: What?! When?

GWEN: Shit.

TOSH: Oh, god.

BB: At 3:47pm, Gwen said, while talking to Toshiko in the living room, 'I'll be shocked if Ianto survives nomination. Everyone will vote for him. I know I'm going to.' Toshiko then replied, 'Yeah, I'm not too sure yet. I wanna see how he behaves. But if he's still moody, I'm nominating him.'

(Ianto looks down)

Then at 3:510pm during a conversation with Jack in the bathroom, Owen said 'No! What kinda idiot are you? God. (Pauses) Tell you something, if I was you, I'd vote for him tomorrow. He's gonna vote for us so let's vote for him. He's a bastard. A class-A bastard. He deserves to be voted out. So nominate him, Y'know everyone else will.'

Jack replied, 'I know he's not exactly been the nicest person. But he deserves our respect. He's just finding his bearings at the minute maybe we shouldn't gang up on him. (Sigh) Anyway, I already know who I'm voting for.'

Owen then asked: Oh, yeah? Who?

Jack replied: Well, its two women I'll tell you that.

Owen then proceeded to say: Ooh, ganging up on the girls? What happened to you being out to get John?

Jack replied: I'm cutting him a little slack. I'm putting the past behind me. I'm never going to enjoy this experience if I let him drag me down, eh?

As you can see this is distinctively breaking the rules regarding nominations. Therefore, Big Brother will be forced to punish you. Your punishment will arise in due course.

(Big Brother stops talking. Everyone mumbles in annoyance and goes back to whatever they were doing, with, however, a more depressed mood)

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**Hope you liked **

**Review please xxx**


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